Written by Kelly Hudgins
As you’re likely a fellow parent reading this post, you know that parenting during a pandemic is hard. I could list all the challenges and stresses there are, but you know this already. We can relate to each other in that way. It’s hard, but I’ve also found so much joy by having my now 2-year-old son around during these crazy times, and by remembering that I am an individual person beyond being a mother.
My son Isaac turned 7 months old on March 14, 2020, and that day we had my husband Andrew’s parents and grandparents down for a visit at our house. Looking back on it, we think, “Should our family have even been here that day?!” There was so much we didn’t know at that point about COVID. Throughout the days, weeks, and months that followed, I was running my photography business during naptime, before my son woke up, and after he went to bed. I was hanging out with him in the time in between, and what a sacred time it was. Let me just say that I feel blessed to have a job that has allowed us to be together at home – for the sake of our time together, and for the sake of staying with him during the pandemic. Being home together meant that the pandemic wasn’t constantly on the forefront of my mind. I was able to focus on this chubby, giggling baby boy, and my heart got so much joy from that.
Fast forward a couple of pandemic years (crazy, isn’t it?), and things look a little different. While the pandemic still rages on, I’m met with mixed messages of high death tolls and people we personally know getting COVID, alongside messages saying that the end of the pandemic is in sight. Isaac started going to a Montessori preschool 3 mornings per week, so now schooling decisions are in the mix while dealing with the pandemic. (Thankfully there has only been ONE instance of a positive case in the school and we kept him home that week–needless to say, we are grateful.) Throughout these past two years of stress and tough decisions, what hasn’t changed is the joy I get from being Isaac’s mama. Is it exhausting? Yes. Are there so many frustrating moments when he’s not listening? Yes. But as you know, parenting a toddler is like a rollercoaster, and there are so many moments of laughter and random “I love you Mommy”s that warm my heart along the way.
Beyond being Isaac’s mama, the biggest thing that has brought me joy recently is making more time for myself. This can feel impossible when all I want to do at the end of a long day is collapse on the couch and zone out watching TV. I still do that, but I’ve been trying hard to get to bed at a decent time so I can wake up in the morning and do something for myself before doing things for anyone else. I joined an online workout program so I can pull up a workout video whenever I want – currently 2-3 mornings/week for me. I do Yoga with Adriene on YouTube. I do “morning pages” stream of consciousness journaling. I list out things I’m thankful for and things that have brought me joy recently. Hopefully soon I’ll actually start digging into a devotional and spend some of that time with God. I only do one of these things each morning, and sometimes I don’t actually get to bed early enough, so that time needs to be spent sleeping instead, but doing something for ME, my body, and my mind FIRST allows for such a fresh start to the day. I’ll also say that my husband and I take turns taking care of our son between the time he gets up at 7am and around 8am, so having that extra hour some days helps a lot in making this personal time possible.
In addition to making time for myself first in my daily routine, I’m currently in a beginning pottery wheel class offered through my city’s parks & rec programs! I set out this year wanting to do more things that make me feel whole, and digging into different kinds of creativity is one thing that’s really life-giving for me. (Funny enough, I signed up for the class before setting that intention for the year!) I left my first class with my heart feeling so happy. Getting my hands messy, learning something new and making perfectly imperfect pieces out of a chunk of clay – it all feels really good and renewing for me. I’m about halfway through the program, and I’m considering signing up for the open studio membership after this so I can continue going in and playing with clay whenever I want.
If you’re feeling bogged down by the day-to-day parenthood tasks during this crazy pandemic season, I highly recommend finding even just 15 minutes of time in your day to devote to yourself only, and then seeing if you can find a longer chunk of time somewhere else in the week, too. I’ve never felt the phrase “you can’t pour from an empty cup” so deeply than in these last couple of years, and now that I’m finally pouring into myself regularly, I’m finding that I have more energy (and patience) to take into the day and I’m able to treasure those joyful moments with my son even more.
About Kelly: Kelly is a toddler mama in Raleigh, NC & loves going on hikes & other outdoor adventures with her husband, son, & retriever-mix pup. When she’s not spending time with them, she creates heirloom artwork for her photography clients so they can savor the memories they’re creating with their own little ones for the rest of their lives. You can find her at @lightcreativeart on Instagram to follow along with her personal life & the ways she serves her clients through Light Creative!
